Journey Of Marriage

JOURNEY OF MARRIAGE

With the life becoming a race and day getting shortened we all are on a track-track of life. We are running after one or another thing in chase of happiness, taking all the toll and keeping our eyes on the final destinations.

We suppose that once we reach there we would b happy and enjoy then. But does it really happens????

Once we chase the thing we were aspiring for we feel like that we had missed a lot in our lives. In quest of some big happiness we had sacrificed all the little moments that were too sweet and adorable .

This is the scenario in every phase of life and even marriages are not untouched  with this race.

In zest of our D – day we miss all the precious moments leading to this beautiful event .The journey of marriage from engagement to the wedding is beautiful at its every milestone.

The voyage starts with the photographs being exchanged followed by the tray of tea in girl’s hand and all the people staring her as if some supernatural power had stepped down on earth. A trail of questions with loads of expectations are on the way. Girl with all the possible decent behaviour  tries to be calm on the most irritating questions and answers every little thing bearing an 32 teeth smile on her pretty nervous face.

Where the in laws are judging her “susheelta” and “sundarta” , boy is sitting in world of different thoughts. He is in dielemme whether the beautiful face sitting before him is beautiful at heart too????Will she love him????Will she take care of her parents???Will she be compatible???Will she be the one whom I had always dreamt of???

He tries to find all the answers in the eyes of gal by looking at her from the corners of his eyes.

The heart of the gal is also at the same pace. Though answering all the whereabouts to elders, she is too keen to know does the boy liked her??? Will he be her prince charming?? Will he support her throughout the life?? Will he be honest and trustworthy???

After all the discussions between elders to each other’s kids, finally it’s the time for the boy nd gal to talk each other. With lots of hesitation and nervousnesss they proceed and on their affirmation rishta gets confirmed  from both sides.

Would be man and the wife exchange their numbers and all of a sudden the unknown numbers  become most recently and most frequently dialled in their cell phone. Every beep makes the heart beat run fastly , throughout the day they keep waiting to be in touch .Together they plan for the future coming ahead .

Love is totally in the air.

They get engaged, many rituals are followed. Their every single day passes as if a light year. Both of them desperately wait for the day when they would tie in the pious knot to be each other’s or forever.

Finally the big day arrives .With all the blessings of loves ones , they enter into a new world-the world that existed only in dreams few months back……

Beauty of any destination lies in its journey and we at ultra rich keep care that none of your milestone gets unenjoyed……………..

 

 

Namrta Chauhan

The Wedding rings and Diamond

The Wedding rings and Diamond

Wedding rings are the most important ornament of a wedding. The ceremony of wearing a wedding ring dates 11th century in the western culture. In India it has been much older, we have read stories were rings have been exchanged between couples as a sign of love. Traditionally, the wedding ring is presented as a betrothal gift by a man to his prospective spouse while he proposes marriage or directly after she accepts his marriage proposal thus, represents a formal agreement to future marriage. The wedding ring is worn on the wedding day in the western culture and on the engagement ceremony in the Indian culture. The ring so worn not only depicts the love of his or her better half but also that the person is booked and hence not available for further affairs.

Ring finger- is also known as the magical figure in some ancient culture, while the others call it a nameless finger (Anamika-in Sanskrit). The wedding ring is worn in this finger because the vein in this finger, called (Vena Amoris) as said to be directly connected to the heart, a symbol of love.

Initially wedding rings were like bands a circle which showed a never ending cycle of love for each other and then came the stone on top of that circle to make that band more beautiful.

In the wedding rings 18 carat gold is preferred but, common metal types such as goldplatinumtitaniumsilver and stainless steel are also used for engagement rings. This allows for the bride-to-be to exert her own individual style into the ring in a simplistic manner. Now a day’s Brides are very conscious and particular about their wedding rings because not only they wear the ring throughout their lives but also because it has become a sign of their spouse wealth. The size of diamond in a bride’s wedding band depicts the worth of her husband’s wealth this tradition is actually very old. In older times, the wedding rings were not only a sign of love, but were also linked to the bestowal of ‘earnest money’.

Diamonds have been chosen as the stone in the wedding ring because they are said to last forever. A compressed compound of carbon diamond has an extremely long life. This particular feature of a long life gives diamond a place in the wedding ring. The value of diamond in the wedding ring ranges from some thousands to crores of rupees depending upon individuals.

Anchal Jain

Marriage – A divine Relation

Marriage-a  divine relation

Mehendi hai rachne wali hatho me ghri lali……kahe sakhiya ab kaliya hatho me khilne wali h…tere man ko jeevan ko nai khusiya milne wali…….o hariyali banno

The day of marriage is  the day of sharing a lifetime eternal bond. Fragnance of the D- day since the ritual of roka doesn’t let the future bride and the bridegroom to sleep. All of a sudden dreams filled wide open eyes change the world of the girl and the boy.Both express their excitement in different ways- where the boy expresses it by looking for all the possible honeymoon destinations,the girl gets over conscious about her looks and all the ceremonies .Their heart beats resonate but the way of expression lies in the genes!!!!

The childhood dream of the girl of her prince charming coming to her riding a white horse and that of a boy unveiling his bride on d bed of roses is suddenly going to become a reality. The roka comes with a lot of questions!!!! Is he/she the right person to spend the whole life with? Will she care and love me as my mother did? Will he support me like my father? Will she prove a daughter to my parents rather than a typical bahu and vice versa? They actually try to find answer to satisfy their question for each other by talking a lot just after the marriage has been fixed in today’s scenario.This is the exact time when they come close to each other and take their first steps towards developing understanding-this period basically  bridges the foundation of a new budding lifetime relationship.

As the day of the grand event comes closer followed by a trail of rituals and ceremonies, the families get ample time to develop understanding and this is what actually matters in an arrange marriage which is aptly described as-“saadi na sirf do insano ka balki do parivaro ka mail h” .Each ritual has its own significance but the prime concern is to nourish the budding relation with all the blessings , love and care that can be showered!!!

Finally the eternal bond comes with its own responsibilities and expectations which must be timely and unnoticeably fulfilled to keep the tree of family and relations lively for the branches to bear its sweet fruits and it becomes the responsibility of both the sides to forward a hand of mutual respect to achieve a common goal of HAPPY LIVING.

With ULTRA RICH we help you to take your first steps towards finding a match that will actually prove your better half in every way and later giving this match god’s affirmity to share a lifetime bond.

RELATIONS ARE MADE IN HEAVEN,WE KNOW WHERE TO FIND YOUR SOUL MATE AND HOW TO TIE THE KNOT!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Namrta Chauhan

A Mother Says

A mother says………

From K.G. till graduation,

U were always a kid at heart my son.

From your first kite,

to the college’s  fight.

U were so enthusiastic,

for anything that u felt realistic.

U showed me loads of tantrums in temperament,

but always cared for my every sentiment.

U were always disorganized,

but  please try to be somewhat synchronized.

Now when u had grown up dear,

and gonna marry sum gal in future near.

I just wanna say,

be responsible and keep your wife gay.

Treat her like  your queen,

give  her all the happiness that one had ever seen.

She will come leaving her own family,

to become only yours for forever solely.

Be trust worthy and honest to her,

don’t let ever suffer.

As you are the apple of my eye,

she is also someone’s cutie pie.

 

Namrta Chauhan

 

AFTER EFFECT OF MARRIAGE

Marriage lays the foundation of a family. According to me, getting married is a must! You need to find the right person to get married to. There are two different ways that we generally follow to get married, either arranged marriage or love marriage. The former is the most commonly followed in India. However while considering both, I found out that there are certain side effects related to both the types. Let us consider one at a time.
where each time I hear the phrase “Arranged Marriage”, I recollect the song of “Apache Indian”. He goes on to describe the girl he wants to get married to “me want gal, to look after me, to make me roti…” The concept of arranged marriages is the usual norm followed in India. It is how most of the Indians get married. No matter how westernized India may have become arranged marriages are still preferred in most of the Indian families. The concepts of arranged marriage may sound impractical to the Western world but for Indians it is something they favor. It is a system, which originated when child marriage was a custom in the country.
If we consider the side effects of arranged marriage, the first thing that comes to my mind is that the boy and the girl do not get to know their future spouses before marriage. Two unknown people get married without knowing and understanding each other. I have heard of many cases from my friends that girls even do not get the opportunity to see their bridegroom before marriage. In case of arranged marriagesthe marriage itself is the beginning. They will have to start from the scratch, know each other, fall in love or rather you have to fall in love, as you have no other choice.
The matching of kundalis (horoscopes) is a must, but does that mean that the partners are compatible mentally, emotionally and also physically. One fine day you will suddenly find a person totally unknown to you and it is decided that you ought to live the rest of your life with him. According to me the rest of the life comes later, at that point of time you feel how to spend a day with him. Everything turns out to be in a haphazard condition. These are some drawbacks that one face in an arranged marriage. I also had an arranged marriage. For me it was like staying with a stranger. I remember the mornings when I used to get up and get baffled as to who was sleeping beside me and at times I used to even get afraid. But then things get all settled and you feel afraid when that person is not there beside you. That is called ‘Love’, which turns everything at ease.
Not all the love stories in love marriages have happy endings. In love marriages you come to know each other quite well, as you get to spend time with each other, fall in love, and then decide to get married. Although there is other side of the coin too, which I believe is very true. Staying with a person under the same shelter requires lot of adjustments, patience and understanding from both. Even after you spend hours with each other, situation after marriage is totally different.
In love marriages there is nothing new to discover which at times may end up making your life boring. When two people are in love, they are at their best to impress each other. They behave, they talk and they wear what the other person likes. It is after marriage that you get to know the person behind the mask. On the other hand there are couples who are still discovering each other even after several years of their marriage. This is the actual beauty of a relationship where everyday you discover a new thing about your partner.
Love or arranged both are based on empathy, responsibility, commitment, love and concern. It’s not just about initial love and attraction it needs a lot of dedication and effort to sustain a marriage. So there is nothing like an ideal marriage it’s all about the way you perceive your marriage. After all you should be happy with your life partner irrespective of love or arranged marriage.

– SANJAY SINGH CHAHAR

WEDDING RITUALS IN AP

The rituals conducted by the Telugu speaking people during the ceremonious occasion of wedding are different from those conducted in neighboring southern states of India. In Andhra Pradesh, the Telugu people follow their own traditions, while conducting a wedding. The bride’s maternal uncle and her brother play a prominent role at the time of the her marriage.
Telugu wedding ceremony is organized in a unique way. It is an elaborate affair, wherein a number of rituals are conducted before, during and after the marriage. The preparations for the festive occasion start with the finalization of the wedding date, which is done well before the ‘important day’. As a part of the customary, the Telugu people call on an astrologer to fix a date and time (muhurtham) for the auspicious occasion. This paves the way to the commencement of the preparations for the wedding, which are done in the most elaborate, colorful and vivacious way.
All the rituals conducted throughout the Telugu wedding ceremony hold religious significance. Each element in the ceremonies is connected with the other and is given special importance. Some people also conduct a couple of pujas prior to the wedding, so that the ceremony is organized without any hassle. This makes Telugu marriage a marvelous event to witness. One would be keen in looking at the way the bride is handed over to the groom by her father (kanyadaan) and the methods by which the groom ties the mangalsutra around her neck. In this section, we have given detailed information on the Telugu wedding ceremony.
The rituals conducted by the Telugu speaking people during the ceremonious occasion of wedding are different from those conducted in neighboring southern states of India. In Andhra Pradesh, the Telugu people follow their own traditions, while conducting a wedding. The bride’s maternal uncle and her brother play a prominent role at the time of the her marriage. Apart from being an event that calls for religious observance, the traditional Telugu wedding consists of some fun moments as well. If you want to know more about the Telugu wedding rituals, then this article is what you need. Here, we have provided comprehensive information on the ceremonies conducted during traditional Telugu marriage.
Telgue wedding customs are as follows:
Muhurtham
An auspicious time for the marriage, also known as muhurtham, is chosen by the family astrologer. The Telugu people generally avoid months including Aashad, Bhadrapad and Shunya, because they are considered inauspicious time for the ceremonious occasion.
Pendlikoothuru
In the Pendlikoothuru ceremony, turmeric paste and oil is smeared to the bride and the groom, at their respective homes. This is done to cleanse their skin, so that a natural glow is radiated. After bathing the bride and the groom, they are given a new set of clothing to wear. The bride is adorned with flowers and jewelry.
Snathakam
Snathakam ritual takes place at the bridegroom’s residence before the muhurtham. As a part of this custom, the groom is asked to wear a silver thread on his body. The ritual is conducted a few hours prior to the wedding.
Kashi Yatra
After reciting the Vedic verses, the groom pretends to go on a Kashi yatra. He shows that he has discarded the worldly pleasure an is no more interested in leading a family life. He is then stopped by the brother of the bride, who persuades him to assume the responsibility of a householder.
Mangala Snaanam
As a part of Mangala Snaanam custom, the bride and groom are required to take an auspicious bath on the wedding day. The aim is to purify them and make them prepared to perform sacred rites.
Aarti

Oil is applied to the bride and groom at their respective houses. Thereafter, the family members get together to perform Aarti. They pray to Lord to give wisdom to the bride and groom to lead their life happily.
Ganesh And Gowri Puja
Before the wedding ceremony, the groom attends the Ganesh pooja, which is conducted at the mandapam.
Kanyadaan
Kanyadaan is the ceremony in which the girl’s family hands over their daughter’s responsibility to the groom. During the ceremony, the bride sits in a bamboo basket. Her maternal uncle brings her to the mandapam. Until the completion of the kanyadaan, the bride and the groom are not allowed to look at each other and therefore, they are separated by a curtain that is place between them, as a partition. Thereafter, the bride’s parents wash the groom’s feet, assuming him as an ‘avatar’ of God.
Jeelakarra Bellamu & Madhuparkam
The priest recites the shlokas from the Vedas. Thereafter, the couple is asked to smear a paste made from cumin seeds and jaggery on each other’s hands. This custom is referred to as Jeelakarra-Bellamu. This ceremony is observed to communicate that the relationship of the married couple is unbreakable and inseparable.As a part of Madhuparkam ritual, the bride dresses up in white cotton sari with red border. On the other hand, the groom wears white dhoti with red border. White is the color for purity and red is for strength.
Sumangli
Ten married women (sumangalis) accompany the bride. Six out of the ten women hold plates containing a mixture of rice and turmeric powder, while the rest of the four hold small lit lamps in their respective plates. Rice represents abundance, while the lit lamps symbolize light.
Tying of the Mangalsutra
In order to perform the ritual, the partition between the bride and the groom are removed. After removing the partition, the groom ties the two strings of the mangalsutra, each with a golden disc, around the groom’s neck. The mangalsutra
represents the physical, mental and spiritual union of the couple. In the Telugu wedding, the groom ties three knots of mangalsutra.
Kanya Daan Akshata
In the Kanya Daan Akshata ceremony, the bride and groom exchange garlands. People witnessing this occasion come forward to bless the couple, by sprinkling flower petals and rice coated with turmeric powder.
Saptapadi
As a part of the Saptapadi ritual, the groom and bride walk seven steps together around the fire, while chanting mantras. When the pheras are conducted, the pallu of bride’s sari is tied to one end of the groom’s dhoti.
Sthaalipaakam
Sthaalipaakam is a ritual wherein the groom adorns the feet of the bride with silver toe rings. In order to ward-off the evil eye, she is asked to wear a string of black beads during the ceremony.
Grihapravesh
After the culmination of the wedding ceremony, the bride is formally taken to the groom’s house. This is called grihapravesh of the bride. As she steps into her new home, she is welcomed by the groom’s family members, including his mother and close relatives.
Uniting The Mangalsutra
Grihapravesh is followed by a ceremony, wherein the mangalsutra is united. As a customary, the Telugu speaking people unite the two mangalsutras (which was tied by the groom around the bride’s neck), on a common thread. This ritual is done sixteen days post wedding. This ritual can be performed by either the groom or an elderly member of the family. A few black or golden beads are slipped between the two ‘plates’ of the mangalsutra, so that they do not clash with each other. The unison of mangalsutra signifies the harmony between the two families. After the ceremony is over, the bride takes a bath and wears a new sari.

– SANJAY SINGH CHAHAR

INDIAN ARRANGED MARRIAGES

Arranged marriages vary in both nature and duration of time from meeting to engagement. In arranged marriage, the parents may only introduce their son or daughter to a potential spouse.Most of the People of India basically follow the arranged marriage system, and they consider it as something great. Dating is a taboo in that country. However, it has its own merits and demerits. Indian people give much importance to family relationship. The system seems to protect the family. The parents take care of their children, and the children obey their parents. Parents find suitable spouses for their children from appropriate families. So, there is no chance of marrying outside their own religion, caste, social status or economic class. This protects the couple from the problems that usually originate from disparity of religion, caste and class. Through a marriage two families come into mutual relationship, and both families together try to work out the marriage if problems arise in the marriage. the arranged marriage system has its flaws. This system originated when child marriage was the custom in India. Children at an early age, even before their puberty, were given in marriage. Such children could not give valid consent to marriage, and so parents were consenting. The purpose of child marriage was to prevent those children from seeking by themselves (when they become adults) somebody from lower caste or lower class for marriage. It was a means of restriction to their children from marrying outside their race and social status. Thus arranged marriage system is a product of caste system. It has developed to promote racism and classism, and it is not based on any spiritual value.
Child marriages are now abolished by law, and the children are free to choose their own partners, according to law. But, you know, racism is in the blood, and the parents, even now, try to control their children by arranging marriages within the limits of race, caste, class and religion. If children find their own mates, parents would threaten them in many ways — threatening not to give them any share of family property or wealth; threatening to drive them out of their own homes. If any children marry according to their own desire, parents would consider it as a threat and shame to the family. So, many men and women just accept what their parents arrange for them. They don’t want to lose their share of property, and they don’t want to invite any shame to their family. Even if they don’t like the spouse they get, they accept what they receive and suffer the consequences silently. According to divine plan marriage should happen through love and the consent of those who marry. In arranged marriages, it is the parents who decide and give consent. Very often there is so much force and fear involved in marriage–force from the parents and fear from the part of children who wish to marry. It doesn’t fit into the modern definition of marriage which is the total partnership of the whole of life which happens through mutual consent and love of those who enter into marital union. Marriage should happen through mature decision of those who marry, and not of their parents.
It also should be noted that arranged marriages are prevalent among the high-caste and high-class people. They are the people who want to protect their “status”. People of lower strata do not care about this very much. The reason for this is: they have nothing to lose. However, they also try to imitate the way of higher level people, believing that it is something great. Another reason for arranged marriages among the lower class is ethnic rivalry and pride over their own race.Matrimonial classifieds in newspapers or help of marriage brokers are sought in arranged marriage when the family fails to find “suitable” spouses for their children. All necessary “qualifications” (racial, religious, economic, educational, etc.) of the “candidates” would be stated in the advertisement.A modern curse connected with arranged marriage is dowry. It is a social evil in India though it is prohibited by law. When they arrange a marriage, the consent of boy and girl who are to enter into marriage is not important; the negotiation is on the amount of dowry which is to be given by the girl’s family. It has become something like a trade in modern Indian culture. The girls from poor families, and the girls who are orphans are not good commodities in this trade; so they remain unmarried. If the promised dowry is not given by due date, the girl would be persecuted and thrown out by her husband’s family; or, she would die in a “domestic accident”. Do not think that I am exaggerating; it is happening in India everyday.
Another drawback of arranged marriage is that the partners to marriage do not know their future spouses before marriage. In arranged marriage it is not important at all. In many cases, the boy and girl who get ready to enter into marriage may see each other two or three times before marriage, and that meeting would be in the presence of parents and other family members. Thus, marriage happens without knowing each other. Many people who work in far away places, especially in gulf countries come home for a leave, and marriage is arranged within a week or two. Legally speaking, you do not give valid consent to accept something you do not know. It is consent that brings a marriage; and, if there is no valid consent, there is no marriage according to the law of the Catholic Church. Marriages contracted because of force or fear would be invalid according to Canon Law. If we strictly analyze, many marriages happening in India are invalidGood marriages, that are arranged, do occur. Parents who love their children, and who are not vitiated by false family pride, seek the consent of their children when they are given in marriage. “Good” arranged marriages happen when the parents help their children to find their own partners according to their own desires.
Arranged marriage system in India is bad in one sense but good in another sense. It is bad when marriage is arranged with such a hatred and prejudice over other religions, castes and races; it is bad when parents over-protect and control their children to the extent of denying every wish, and even every right of their children in choosing their partners. Arranged marriages are wonderful when parents and children love each other sincerely, and total freedom is given to children for final consent to marriage; and, when arrangements are made for the would-be-spouses to meet and to know each other.In India many people believe that by marriage a woman enters into a bondage, and in Indian situation this is pretty accurate–woman is not free. In arranged marriage, her consent is not sought; her desires have no importance; and, even if she loves somebody to be her husband, family not only doesn’t give any consideration to that but also threatens her in many ways. After marriage, in many cases, she is like a slave. She must be submissive to the abuses of the husband and his family.Whether it be arranged marriages or courtship marriage, people seek perfect husbands and perfect wives. A perfect husband or a perfect wife is a myth. No such person lives or ever lived in this world. We should not expect anyone to be 100 percent perfect. We are all called to be perfect, but we are only on the way to it. We have to accept each other with each one’s weaknesses and failings. As there is no perfect wife or perfect husband, there is no perfect marriage either. Success of marriage is in mutual understanding and acceptance, and also in mutual love and respect.

– SANJAY SINGH CHAHAR